


Sins Of His Past

by BrokenHeartedQueen



Series: Whumptober [2]
Category: Batman (Comics), Batman - All Media Types
Genre: Angst, Fluff and Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Whumptober, Whumptober 2018
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-10-03
Updated: 2018-10-06
Packaged: 2019-07-24 11:18:32
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,902
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16173995
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BrokenHeartedQueen/pseuds/BrokenHeartedQueen
Summary: Damian is reminded of his past.





	1. Bloody Hands

**Author's Note:**

> This is a really short one! This is part one with bloody hands the second part will be completed with another prompt and it will be much longer! Hope you enjoy!

Damian could hear his Father talking to Drake. It seemed they discussed the details of the serial killer case. At this time, they had connected six killings to the same person. He heard whispers of how his trademark seem to be a gruesome one. Damian was away on a mission with his team when the murders happened. He had just arrived at the manor this morning, he was now able to assist his Father and even Drake. That was the reason he was headed toward their voices, so he could offer his help.

“Bruce, he clearly has his trademark with the markings. There more to it, the way he handles his victims before killing them…it is horrible. The reality of this situation that what he is doing takes skill. To be able to do this much damage he was obviously trained. We should look for a mentor as well, or perhaps he even a copycat we must research all the options.” Tim explained as he pointed at all the pictures. Damian though it was the perfect timing to interrupt.

“As foolish as Drake can be, this time his logic is sound.” He said as he made his was to the table. He tried to look at the pictures, but Bruce cover the pictures before he could see it.

“Damian, I don’t want you involve in this case. There some details I do not want to expose you to.” Bruce explained as he tried to protect his youngest, at least a little.  
The youngest was about to protest, tell his Father that he is mature enough to handle this case. If his Father could trust Drake, he could trust him. Before Damian could say  
anything, he heard Timothy scoffed. Damian looked at him incredulously as Tim just shrugged at him.

“I just find the entire thing ridiculous.” He said as he looked at Bruce.

“It just Demon Brat here has probably seen worst than this. He is Robin he sees things like this all the time.” Timothy said with an eyeroll as he threw the pictures on the table, so Damian could see him.

Damian was not able to hold the small gasp that left him as he stared at the pictures. What did…monster did to its victims was simply horrifying. They suffer for a long time…that was evident. The methods of torture they used was excessive, the only purpose of it was to cause excruciating pain. He could see by his trademark that this person wanted to be recognize, he wanted to be fear.

He was so focused on the pictures that he had missed the argument that had begun between Bruce and Timothy.

“I did not want Damian involved in this case!” Bruce fumed as he stared down at Timothy.

“Oh please, B! We already seen cases like this before! Is a joke to try to protect him from it! Hell Bruce! He probably done something worst than this during his time in the League.” Tim huffed angrily as he crossed his arms over his chest.

A strong intake of breath broke up the fight. Both parties looked at Damian in surprised, as he looked up horrified at Tim. Damian could not believe Drake would say that, that he would think that he was capable of something so horrific. The sad thing…is that Damian could not denied that allegation. During his time at the League he did a lot of things he regrets. He stared down at his hands, wondering how many people he had tortured and killed. Damian would like to believe that he become a better person. He has change, he threw away the belief that was force into his mind by his Grandfather. He though that he finally got rid of all the bad Ra’s Al Ghul taught him. He was foolish to think that will erased all the wrong he done. There is no way for him to return those lives he took. He went on his journey to try to fix the damage he caused during the Year of Blood. Damian always felt it was not enough.

His hands were drenched with blood and there was no way for him to change that.


	2. When Nightmares Meet Memories

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is Insomnia! It is really late but I am definitively doing all the prompts they will just be push back! I really hope you enjoy this!

After what Damian heard Tim said he stormed out of the room. He tried to get some alone time, to be able to get his memories in control. He needed to meditate, to get those images out of his mind. It worked for a while, he did not live in constant reminder of his past. Damian felt foolish to think this will last forever. There was one place he could never escape his past. As soon as he would close his eyes he would be faced with memories in form of a nightmare.

 

His sleep was plagued with memories of the past. He tried desperately to make it stop with many different methods. He would meditate, drink tea, warm milk and he even tried sleeping pills which just made matters worse.

 

He even considered speaking to Alfred about his problems, but as soon as he would get the courage to approach him, he would decide against it. He could not stop the small voice in the back of his head that told him how childish it would be to bother Alfred.

 

As nights past his little sleep became no sleep. Damian decided that if every time he tried to sleep he will be haunted by his actions, he would rather get no sleep at all.  He was trained in the League on how to spend long period of time with no sleep. Damian just decided to apply that training to his regular life. It worked for a while, but he was starting to feel the consequences of his actions.

 

Robin was still going on patrol, the first few days it was fine. He was tired, but not enough to affect his fighting ability. He was quieter, did not speak unless someone ask him a question. Damian would lie to himself and say that he was conserving energy, but he knew that he feared what would come out of his mouth.

 

By the time he hit eight days without sleep he was feeling it, deep within his bone. Robin fighting style was started to get affected and he was getting hurt. His response time was slower, there was moments were his vision would turn dark, before he was able to adjust himself. Eventually, his Father decided that Damian was not fit for patrol and demanded that he get some rest. It was a surprise to no one when Damian did the exact opposite of what Bruce ask him to do. He did everything possible to stay awake.

 

Tim found him in the sofa watching television. He was starting to worry about the Brat. Damian skin was usually bronze in color, was now a sickly gray color. His eyes were bloodshot, the bags under his were huge and made him look like a skeleton. Tim approach him with a of cup of Chamomile tea in hopes of getting his youngest brother to sleep. 

Tim made sure to make some noise as he approached Damian, he did not want to startled him. Damian looked up at his brother who offer him a cup of tea, he took the cup with a small nod. Tim sat down next to Damian, both were quiet.

 

“You know everyone notice you haven’t been sleeping…” Tim started the conversation as he looked at him.

 

Damian already knew everyone noticed how tired he was. It will be hard not to, when he was making amateurs mistakes. The way he looked...even he was having trouble recognizing himself. Damian wrapped a blanket around himself as he took a sip of his tea. The only response he gave Timothy was a small shrug.

 

“Damian...what’s wrong?” 

 

He did not offer Tim an answer. It was more because he did not see the point in explaining what was going through his mind. There was no solution to this problem. It was something that he had to lived with.  

 

“Is it nightmares? You can talk to us about it, you know even B gets them. It comes with doing what we do. I understand-”

 

“You do not understand! There is no way you could!” Damian cut Tim off with a scream as he stood up from the sofa, letting the almost empty cup fall to the floor. One could hear the cup shattering echoing thru the room.

 

Drake looked up to him in surprised. He could not understand what made Damian react the way they did. He just wanted to help. 

 

“I get nightmares as well...I know a lot about insomnia, hell I practically survive on coffee. I know it’s bad for me and I have learned some methods that can be used to help.” Tim tried once again hoping his little brother wouldn’t be so stubborn.

 

“You don’t get it! There **nothing** you can do to help! You act like you understand what I am through but you will  **never** know. You are the son Father chose. The prodigy! The heir! The one I will always have to live up to!” Damian said as he tugged at his hair.

 

“ I am the tainted child the one who no ones wants. Talia disown me, Father only has me here, because he fears what I can do. He never wanted me, and I sometimes wonder if he ever will.”

Tim could heard the heart wrenching sobs his little brother let out. He was in shocked over what he was hearing Damian say.

 

“You resented me so much over the fact I was raised in the League. I hated you for that...because you were right. During my time there, I knew in my soul that what I was doing was wrong, but I was so desperate to gain my Grandfather approval that I would have done anything...and I did. It was never enough, challenge after challenge a new, harder mission would appeared. All for a man who never saw me as a human, but a weapon, a vessel for him to used and control however he sees fit.” Damian left a shuddering breath as he let the tears fall down his face.    
  


Tim wanted to interrupt him, let him know that everything he was saying was wrong. Tim had the desire to know everything Damian was feeling so he could hit every single point and show him the truth. Damian look up at him with tears still going down his face. He look defeated, tired and resigned. 

“I came here...and thanks to Father, Richard and even you. I learned what it means to be good and I tried so...so hard to do good. Timothy, I have sacrificed  **everything.** No matter how many lives I save, it will  **never** erased all the lives I took...all those lives I ruined. My hands are **filled** with blood.” Damian was now hiccuping as he stared down at his hands.

 

“That why it is not the same...I do not simply have nightmares, what I see are my own memories. I have to face the horrors of my own actions.” Damian said sadly at he looked up at Tim.

 

“I go out there as Robin and take down criminals. But who am I to pass judgement, when I have done so much worst?” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't ya worry! There is a third part coming up! I survive on comments and kudos! You can find me in tumblr! I would love to answer any questions http://kasyfairytaillover.tumblr.com/

**Author's Note:**

> If you had any questions you can find me at @kasyfairytaillover1 I love kudos and specially comments!


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